My Journal- September thru December 1999

Wow, reading that entry is so freaky. I mean, I remember writing it wondering what my life would be like one year from that moment... thinking about HOW FAR AWAY November of 1999 seemed and wondering if I'd even still be around to reflect. I wonder those same things about a year from NOW. This is as close as I can come to traveling in time. Reading that entry was sort of freaky for me. Yet at the same time, I can't help but also share that I'm a little disappointed with the way the past year has gone.

See, I was hoping for BIG things. Good BIG things. Like perhaps winning the lottery or getting an exciting new job or finding the man of my dreams. But none of that has happened. Before I get into this further, I do want to state that I'm glad that nothing BAD has happened. I mean, I'm still fully functioning, have all my loved ones in good health, and have a nice house to live in. I really do appreciate that those things are all still the same, and I hope that remains to be so another year from now.

But back to reflecting... well, I'm still at CompuCom. This is so because I enjoy my job, which is good, however, I am still not an entrepreneur and still have no defined clue on how to obtain that goal without risking too much. I still haven't found the man of my dreams, and am still single, just as I was a year ago. However, as you probably know, I did have one serious relationship this year and that was with Chris. The relationship lasted 6 months and was very intense, but we came to the conclusion that we didn't have enough in common to go for the long haul together. Know what I mean? I know it was the right decision, and I hope and pray for Chris' happiness. However, that leaves me single and looking again. Sometimes I wonder what the deal is? I mean, where is my Mr. Right? You all must know how impatient I can be.

And this leads up to Nick. Yup, of course, Nick and I are still friends. There was a gap there for a while when I started dating Chris that he didn't want to hear from me. However, he had changed his mind a couple months later, and ever since we have been friends. He is still one of my best friends. I think it's OK for me to say here that he's wanting for us to get back together, however, I'm not ready to make that move. As you can imagine, my heart is way too tender when it comes to him. Reading over my entry from Nov. '98 should help refresh that for you.

The good news is that Nick has been free of his addiction for a year now, and I'm very proud of him. He's taken some great steps to straighten out and improve his life. He, of course, still lives in the house he/we bought back in Sept of '98. He's even started working out, which I think is a very physically healthy as well as emotionally healthy thing to do. If you don't know Nick, you can meet him by checking out his web site at www.NickDruga.com.

Also, in the past year I have taken a much more keen interest in my health, diet and fitness. I have dropped at least 30 lbs. of body fat and gained several pounds of muscle. I suppose that is my biggest acheivement. I also have bought a house and did some remodeling to make it be "my home". I love it very much. I hope to continuing making progress on both into the next Century and beyond. But to be honest, I also hope to find myself a wonderful guy who mutually wants to go the "long haul" with me. As you probably know, my brother got engaged this year and I'm so happy for him and his fiance, Theresa. I hope to find the same kind of true love that they share. However, if this upcoming year is not to be the year for finding what I'm looking for, then I can accept that. I don't require a Mr. Right to be happy, but he sure would make things even happier.

Which leads me to say yet again... stay tuned, cuz I'm hoping something exciting will happen in the Y2K for me. And I'll be sure to report and reflect on it all this same time next year. Thanks all, for hanging in here with me; and thanks to my wonderful friends and family for always loving and believing in me.

Yup, that's me. Be sure to check out my Halloween '99 Photos page for more pictures.

I ended up tying for second place in the IS Costume Contest at work. But three other things to mention... our department took first place in the Halloween Skits yet again, and I won the cube decorating contest for both IS AND the entire company. SWEET!

My brother is dressing up with a bunch of friends as the Scooby Doo gang. I can't wait to see the photos from that!

Well, that's all for now. Take it easy.

Example Number Two: Riding a bike without a bicycle helmet. These days, bicycle helmets are the rage and possibly even the law in some states. All I know is, that as a kid and a teenager, I was never required or asked to wear a helmet. I don't even know if bike helmets were invented back then. And thank God, cuz holy cow... those helmets look lame! I must note that if I were a kid in 1999, Mom would most certainly require me to wear a helmet. She's just kinda like that and wants me to live and all. As a matter of fact, I could have used a bike helmet during atleast one point in my life.

Example Number Three: Smoking during pregnancy. Evidentally, no one knew in the '70s that smoking (cigarettes) during pregnancy could cause harm to the baby. But ever since I was born, and grew up to be the freak that I am, everyone has realized differently. I am convinced that if my Mom were pregnant today, she would quit smoking during the term of her pregnancy. Just another example of safety and knowledge increasing over time.

Example Number Four: ATVs. Those gas powered, three-wheeled oversized big wheels that in the 80s were super cool for kids to drive. And they went FAST! Man! What were companies thinking when they decided to market those things to 8 year old kids? Fortunately (or actually, unfortunately) after hundreds of kids were killed or injured on them, they finally decided to stop making 3 wheelers. And thank goodness. Man, our 7 year old neighbor kid when we were growing up had one of those and would take my brother for rides on it in the field behind our apartment complex. They would have shorts and t-shirts on and maybe a pair of sandals if they were lucky. Zooom Zooom! They'd zip around at speeds of atleast 20mph. Seemed cool at the time, but what on earth were we thinking putting a child behind the wheel of a fast, powerful vehicle?! Gasp! I'm just thankful that my brother is alive and here with me today to share this amusing memory.

Example Number Five: Remember Halloween when you were a kid and you could just walk around by yourself from door to door in your neigborhood, and your parents weren't scared you would be abducted? Or how bout when you could eat peices of unwrapped candy corn or candle apples without your parents being convinced they were poisoned or drugged. Heeheeee. Halloween sure was fun when you could trick or treat at night. As far as I know, all states have mandated trick or treat time to be between certain hours and certain daylight times.

Example Number Six: Prior to being a teen, I don't remember EVER having to put an ounce of sunscreen on. I would play all day outside in the sun and burn, burn, burn and never be told to apply sunblock. In this age of skin cancer and UV Ray damage, no proper parent would take their kid to a beach without scrubbing them down in waterproof sunscreen first. Just another example of science catching up with the things we did that we never realized harmed us. My Dad had this tanning machine that was the size of a portable heater. You'd plug it in, turn it on and it had these purple tubes that emitted UV Rays. You'd lay in front of it and get a tan! I remember the thing came with goggles, to protect your eyes, however, I didn't think they were necessary. Geez... it'll be a miracle if I don't come down with skin cancer by the time I'm 30.

Anyway, I know there's a million more things that we have learned that would prevent kids from doing the same sorts of things we were able to do freely back in the 70s and 80s. Perhaps being a kid without a Microwave, VCR or Computer had its advantages after all. So next time you're talking to a kid and he/she is amazed that there were no digital clocks or music videos in your household prior to when you turned 10, be sure to taunt them about how you could crawl around in your station wagon as a kid, unencumbered, and free.

They are planning to get married in about a year. I have been lucky enough to have been asked to be one of her bride's maids, and even though I already know I'm gonna bawl my eyes out as she walks down that isle, I can't wait!

I got pulled over for speeding last Sat. night on my way to Janice's house for a party. Drag it. The funny thing was, I wasn't even expecting it! Normally when I'm speeding, I know I am and I know I'm taking the risk, but this time I truely was in a hurry to get to my friends' place and wasn't even conscious of the fact I was speeding. Darn it.

I was just driving along, then got stuck at a red light (which I fortunately didn't run). Across the intersection there was a cop car that had someone pulled over. 'Sucks for them', I thought. I don't know how long it was before I realized that there was a cop car behind ME with it's lights on. Duh. The light turned green and I drove ahead, thinking perhaps the cop car would pull on by me, to assist the other cop with the speeder. But nope, on came those dang BRIGHT shiner lights and I realized my cup runneth over. Nearly 2 years without a ticket I went! Thanksgiving would have been my two year anniversary. But NOPE. I still had a glimmer of hope, though. Perhaps I would get out of it, perhaps they just wanted to know what my license plate meant, perhaps I would just get a warning.

The truth was, though, this time I had no initiative to attempt to get out of the ticket. I couldn't even enjoy the whole process because I didn't even realize I was speeding. How sad.

As the policeman came up to my window, I remembered my window was broken. Oh man! I'd have to open the door. As I opened the door and looked up, I realized... it was a policewoman. Even LESS fun. Drag.

"Does your window roll down?" She asked after I opened the door partially.

"Sorry, it's broken." I anticipated the infamous question... 'Do you know why I pulled you over?' I was already dreaming up some clever responses when she said...

"I pulled you over because you I clocked you going 56 in a 40." How depressing. What a let down! She skipped the question and went right to the facts. Why me? Do I ask for too much? She then proceeded to ask me for my license and registration and asked me for my home phone, work phone, my shoe size, my ten year goal plan, my favorite toothpaste, and place of employment. Odd. (OK, well, she didn't really ask about the shoe size). She then, of course, went back to her patrol car for what seemed like an ETERNITY. Sometime during that ETERNITY, another patrol car pulled up alongside with its lights on. OOH! Now this was a little exciting! I had TWO cop cars with lights on behind me! Maybe they thought I was a fellon, a murderer.... a cannibal! It was then I was hoping someone who knew me would drive by and spot my plates. I thought it would be kind nifty to be sighted by someone I knew with two cop cars behind me. Made me look like I was reckless or dangerous or something. After 5 minutes, the second patrol car left. My short-lived excitement ended. Drag. Guess they figured out I wasn't a cannibal after all.

Finally, after assumably calling all her friends to find out what my plate meant, and after leisurely reading War and Peace, she returned. "Please sign here to blah blah blah." OK, she didn't say 'blah blah blah', but what she said was pretty boring, so I won't repeat it. So I signed the darned thing saying I was an irresponsible, maniacal peice of doo-doo. She rambled off something about court or something, then the surprising part came. "Thank you." She said as she walked away. Thank you?! I think this cop was a newbie. Surely she was, she was so procedural and boring and personalityless (is that a word?). Hmm... No, after second thought, she must be a seasoned veteran. (OK, that was my attempt on ripping on police officers, so I expect you to "ooooh" me and say 'tisk tisk'.)

So, now I have my $170 ticket (Frickin' A!). Do you realize that I could have gotten a lower fine if I was drinking while driving?! That fine is only $120! But, clearly, going 16 over the limit is much worse than driving drunk. *&^%#!

I'm dreading going to the lame defensive driving class (that'll cost me another $40) that will take up my entire Saturday and start at 8 in the morning. 8 in the morning? Good lordy, Saturdays are my chance to SLEEP IN! Ugh! But I guess I deserve it... being the low-life, no good, SOBER driver that I am. Sigh.