Wed. Jan. 29th, 1997

Sorry I haven't written in a while; I've been pretty busy, catching up doing a lot of wedding planning that I should have gotten done last year. Things are going OK, though. We've finally booked a DJ, a photographer, and even picked out the cake we want (don't worry, they haven't baked it yet). We also picked out our invitations and I'm going to order them soon. I met with the woman who will be sewing my brides maids' dresses, and discussed a pattern. Things are moving right along. But enough of that.

I have a confession to make. I know, I know... I've made them before. I've admitted to the world I have a blistex addiction, that I've eaten bugs (accidentally), that I've lost some newts, that I dream about tornadoes -- and much much more. But I have something new I must confess.

Something horrible.

Something unbelievable.

You wouldn't ever think it of me.

I know you'll be shocked.

Maybe you won't even speak to me anymore.

OK, I've just got to blurt it out...

I have no patience. Really, I don't. Oh yeah, I know you're sitting there thinking: "Well, she must have some patience." But really, I don't. Well, wait... I shouldn't sell myself that short. I have patience in two cases only really, and that's when I'm with kids (and I want to be) or when I'm teaching someone (something that I want to teach them). Those would be the two times I have patience.

Last weekend, Nick and I were driving out to Garland to the cake bakery place for a tasting, and we took LBJ, which is one of the main freeways that goes through the Dallas area. Well, we were fine for about 2 minutes, then we came into a huge traffic jam. HUGE! They shut down 3 lanes of a 5 lane highway... you can imagine the mess that made.

Wanna know what they shut it down for? OK, I'll tell you...

So anyway, here we are going 2 miles an hour, already late for our appointment. I HATE being late for appointments. Despise it. Thanks goodness Nick has his cellphone. I call up the place, explain we're stuck in a useless traffic jam and say we're going to be 10 minutes late.

10 minutes later we are half a mile down the road. "Hmmmm... think we're going to be later than that." So I call again and apologize that we're not there yet. I tell them I have no idea what time we may be there... maybe 2:00 tomorrow.

After I hang up, I look around at the deserted 3 lanes that are shut down and anger is building inside of me.

Building Building Building Building Building!!

I begin wining to Nick about how awful this is... how it's not fair that the freeway needs to be shut down. I get so upset tears begin to well in my eyes, and I frantically think of a way I can get back at the dumb government for doing this to me. I ask Nick if this bothers him at all, and he shakes his head. How can he be so calm in a situation like this?!?!?! THEN, I can't help but notice we're stuck in the SLOWEST lane of all. The other ones seem to be moving a mile per hour faster!! It's not fair! AHHHH!

... And I start to scream. Just let it loose, ya know? At the very top of my lungs. I vent all my anger and scream out how stupid it is that we're stuck in this jam. I go on for exactly 60 seconds... then I finish.

Silence.

I feel better. I look at Nick and there's a big smile on his face. He sees me looking at him and says something to the effect of: "Wow, that was cool. I had to try so hard not to laugh at your during your fit, but that was halarious. I've never heard you scream like that before. Do you feel better now?"

"A little." I say. "I'm just so mad and I have no patience for this."

"No kidding!?"

Well, we finally made it there, then on our way back home, we took LBJ again, which was clear heading West. We saw all those poor people in the traffic jam on the East side of the freeway and I felt horrible for them.

Do you ever do this... you've just passed a horrible traffic jam that's on the other side of the freeway and you keep going past all the cars, then finally, you get to see the cars on the other side going 60, cause they haven't yet hit the jam. Don't you try and send mental telepathy to them? I mean, it's like all these cars are poor, innocent lambs heading off to the slaughter. Once they get there, there's no turning back.

"GET OFF THE FREEWAY NOW, WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!" I yell, but no one is listening. "Get off, get off, GET OFF!" No one gets off. "Don't you know you'll be stuck in a traffic jam for 3 hours?!?!?! I beg of you--- GET OFF!" But there's nothing you can do. Sort of makes you wonder when people on the opposite side of the freeway yell that same thing as a warning to you.

Thursday Jan. 2nd, 1996

Happy New Year, by the way! Did you make any New Year's Resolutions? I didn't. I should; but I never keep them anyway, so why bother?

Did you eat something special during New Years in order to bring you good luck for 97? Isn't it weird that we actually do that? You know, I thought maybe it was just my family; but I realized this year that I was wrong.

Have you ever noticed that the foods you eat for good luck are the worst tasting foods ever? I mean, you really have to dig deep inside yourself and find out how much you REALLY want good luck. I mean, is eating Sour-Kraut worth it? I don't think so. EWWW! But every year my Mom forced my brother and I to choke down at least a forkful. One year when my brother went away on a trip, she made him take a can of Sour-Kraut and a can opener with him! He had to give her his solemn vow that he would eat at least a bite.

Well, now that I'm down in Texas, I thought I might get to escape that particular sour torture every New Year. I think... "Yes!!! I don't have to eat any disgusting foods for good luck anymore!" But what happens? I'll tell you what happens... A bowl of black-eyed peas are set in front of me at the restaurant.

"What's THIS?", I say.

"Black-eyed peas. They're for good luck."

"You've GOT to be kidding me."

So, I gingerly poke one of these small foriegn objects with my fork. I begin a routine examination... what I always do when I'm about to eat something I've never eaten before. I take the fork and rotate it around, getting a good view of the pea. Looks like a bean. Beans equal yuck. Looks better than Sour-Kraut, though. Hmmm...

I then bring the pea towards my nose. Sniff sniff. Yup, smells like a bean. My brow furrows. As I touch the tip of my tongue to the bean, I can't help but notice that it has grown cold during my investigation. "Oh... just do it!", I say (I'm sooo on the edge, ya know?). I shove the pea/bean into my mouth and chew. Firm on the outside, mushy on the inside. I swallow it quickly. I did it! I'm not seizing, and I'm not feeling the urge to regurgitate! All this for good luck!?

"Did you like it?" My friend asks.

"Mmmm... well, it's better than sour-kraut, but that's not saying much."

"I've never had sour-kraut." She says.

[Scough!] How do some people get so lucky? Oh well, it's all right, because I'm happy with my decision. I ate my bean thing and now I'm destined for good luck in 1997.

.... Or am I? What if I need to eat Sour-Kraut to have good luck, since that has been my tradition thus far? What if the bean wasn't horrible tasting enough to bring me good luck? What if the bean brings me bad luck? Oh woe is me! Now I'm stuck eating BOTH! Someone, QUICK, get me a can of Sour-Kraut before it's too late!

Mon. Dec. 9th

Tues. Nov. 19th

So, I go to the game, possibly risking life and limb, dressing as a cheesehead in the midst of thousands of Cowboy fans. It wasn't so scary, because there were many Packer fans there, too, but not any around my immediate seating vicinity. I had Cowboy fans in front of me, on either side of me and behind me as well!!! They were nice enough, but they couldn't wait to give me hell when the Cowboys killed the Packers.

I didn't think it would turn out that way. I thought for sure I would be the one gloating in the end. So when the game started and Green Bay didn't score, I wasn't so worried. They'd definitely come through, afterall, they almost always do, right? And even the few games they lost, at least they put up a good fight.

When the first quarter ended, the only points scored were by Boniol's (Dallas) 2 field goals. Not worried at all. When the half ended and STILL the only points scored were Boniol's 3 additional field goals, I was only slightly worried. We'd definitely come back!! The Pack was just warming up. When the third quarter ended, Chris Jacke missed a 32 yard field goal and NO points were scored, I started to get concretely worried... but not too worried, the Pack would be Back in the 4th for sure...

Ok... by now I'm getting a lot of gibbing from those around me, I can handle it though, right? Right. Besides, it's not over til the fat lady sings. So, the fourth quarter begins, and not much happens. Our defense is doing well enough not to let the Cowboys score any TDs, so that's something anyway. Yet we haven't scored! What's wrong with Favre? What's wrong with everyone? What's going on? Is it me? I must be bringing them bad luck! DANG! I should've stayed home.

Just when I was completely hopeless, and after Boniol scored his 6th field goal, Farve finally threw a short touchdown pass to Derrick Mayes. I felt like I was the only person in the entire stadium cheering. I think all the other Packer fans were too pissed to cheer. But I held up my flag and sign and cheered loudly while I had reason to. With less than two minutes left in the game I knew we wouldn't score again. As a matter of fact, the Packers couldn't even pull off a two-point conversion, even with two chances (due to a penalty)! Go figure!

Nick asked if I wanted to leave, but I decided we'd stay and suffer through total humilation. After all, we got to see Boniol score his 7th field goal and tie a record. We also go to see the riot that occured after the event. 1 Packer and 3 Cowboys were ejected after that one. I didn't care, I just wanted the game to be over. And so it slowly and painfully ended, 21 to 6. I was exhausted and hurt. How could the Pack do this to me? I'll never hear the end of it! AHHHH! So for those of you who are Cowboy fans, will you please try and go easy on me? I had a very hard night!

Am I still a Packer fan, you ask? Well of course I am. I'd suppose they are upset as I am about their loss. So I'll forgive them this once. Next time they'll show Dallas what they're really made of. There will be no more playing around!